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Get off the treadmill of life and step into the light.
Category
- Meditation
Author
- Lumen
My life was like a squirrel running endlessly on a tiny wheel. Every day, I stood in the same spot, facing similar faces, and before those faces, my story dissipated into thin air. I spoke, but it didn't reach me. I tried, but it didn't return. The unrewarded emptiness and the loneliness of being ignored gradually piled heavily in my chest, forming a lump. That lump made me swallow my words, made me shrink, and even obscured the light within me.
But today, in meditation, I stared straight at that knot. Closing my eyes, I felt something firmly knotted deep within my chest. For a long time, that knot had been squeezing me, unraveled. But as I took a deep breath and gazed at it, I saw that within it was not mere anger or sadness, but a desperate yearning for acceptance. Ultimately, I longed to be loved, to have my words heard, to be used where my presence was needed.
At that moment, a soft light flowed down from above, enveloping my body. The light was warm and flexible, gently untying the knots without forcing them apart. As the light seeped in, the lump in my chest slowly melted away, flowing like waves. I felt lightened from within, and a small courage blossomed within me. That courage wasn't flashy, but it was genuine. "Now I don't need to cling to those who don't recognize my light. I just need to go where my light is needed."
The decision came quietly. It wasn't like a lightning bolt striking my head, but like the gentle, settling morning dew. I heard a voice welling up within me. It told me not to confine myself to the hamster wheel of repetition any longer, not to force my closed ears open, but instead to turn to those who awaited my light. That voice comforted me and simultaneously opened the way forward.
Meditation wasn't simply a time to close my eyes and count my breaths. It was a space where my soul conversed with me. My head confessed its frustrations and obsessions, and my heart accepted those confessions with compassion and warmth. And spirituality, permeating with light, reconciled the two. In this encounter, I reached a resolution. It was a resolution of letting go, a resolution of natural order, and a resolution of courage.
Even if life always seems repetitive, there's always a singularity within it. The light I encountered today in meditation was that singularity. Even amidst the same people, conversations, and circumstances as yesterday, the light that settled deep within my heart opened a new path. It will guide my life a little more gently, gently, yet firmly.
Now I know. My light never faded, but was simply obscured by a dark cloud. For some, it may be a mere beacon, but for others, it can be a beacon that illuminates the darkness. I must meet them, and in that encounter, my life will be renewed.
Today's meditation simultaneously healed me and opened a path for me. It brought me the compassion that released my knots, the joy that seeped into me through light, and the serenity of surrendering to nature. Above all, I resolved to no longer try to prove myself, but to walk alongside those who recognize my light. On that path, my heart will expand, and my soul will be freer.
