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I'm so upset and angry about what happened today that I can't sleep.
Category
- EFT
- Relationship
Author
- Lumen
Hello. I'm so frustrated and have nowhere else to vent, so I'm leaving a message here.
I take a dance class every week, and today I washed some grapes and put them in a glass container to share with my fellow classmates. Everyone enjoyed them, which made me happy, but one of the older ladies said something hurtful to me.
He looked at the glass container I had brought and sneered, "Oh, you're unusual. How are you going to get married if you're so picky?" He'd always been a braggart and prone to speaking rudely to others, so I'd kept my distance. But hearing that in front of me made my blood boil.
I'd prepared this with good intentions for people, but it was so insulting and unfair that someone, based on a single glass container, arbitrarily judged my entire personality and labeled me "unmarriageable." The moment I heard that, my face burned, and I wanted to say something back, but I was so angry that my mouth wouldn't open.
Even after class and I return home, the woman's sarcastic words and expressions continue to haunt me, fueling my anger. My heart races and I feel a pang of frustration, filled with hatred and resentment toward her, and the feeling of being ignored. How can I manage these unpleasant and aggravating feelings? I want to release them. Could EFT help? Please advise.
My heart ached as I read your story, imagining how deeply hurt you must have been when your carefully prepared kindness was met with rude remarks. The experience of having your actions and character judged arbitrarily is deeply infuriating and humiliating for anyone. All of the feelings you're feeling right now are perfectly natural, and I deeply sympathize with and support you for having the courage to resolve them.
EFT can be a very effective tool for safely dealing with these feelings of injustice and discomfort and regaining peace of mind. Follow the EFT manual below, tailored to your specific experience.
Identifying core issues and measuring pain index
First, focus on the emotion that is bothering you the most right now and rate the level of that pain on a scale from 0 (not at all) to 10 (extremely).
First, focus on the emotion that is bothering you the most right now and rate the level of that pain on a scale from 0 (not at all) to 10 (extremely).
"The humiliation of being sneered at for looking at a glass container and saying, 'That's weird.'" (Current pain index: __/10)
"The anger and shame of hearing someone say, 'You're so picky, you won't get married.'" (Current pain index: __/10)
"I feel a deep sense of resentment at having my personality judged so arbitrarily" (Current pain index: __/10)
"Hatred and anger towards that woman" (Current pain index: __/10)
It is effective to start with the highest scoring problem.
Now let's start tapping with a script prepared for your problem.
Dealing with "humiliation and shame"
Distress Index: How much do you currently feel about "the humiliation and shame of being taunted and told you 'you'll never get married'"? (e.g., 9/10)
Confirmation of settings (repeat 3 times while tapping the palm):
"Although I felt deeply humiliated when that old woman sneered at me, judged my character arbitrarily, and shamed me, I truly accept myself from the bottom of my heart."
Continuous tapping (tapping each point):
Reminder: "This humiliation and shame."
(Eyebrow) That sarcastic tone
(Eyes) This feeling of being ignored
(Under the eyes) The shame that makes your face flush
(Under the nose) It's so insulting
(Chin) You judged my personality arbitrarily.
(Clavicle) This deep humiliation
(Under the armpit) You ignored my good intentions.
(Jeongsuri) This terrible shame
Deep Breath and Recalibrate: Take a deep breath and recalibrate your pain index. Repeat the phrase "This remaining humiliation" until it reaches 0.
Dealing with "Anger and Resentment"
Distress Index Scale: How angry and resentful are you currently with the situation and the person?
Confirmation of settings (repeat 3 times while tapping the palm):
"Although I feel deeply angry and resentful that my good intentions have been ignored and my personality has been insulted, I nevertheless accept myself with sincerity from the bottom of my heart."
Continuous tapping (tapping each point):
Reminder: "This anger and resentment."
(Eyebrow) I feel like my blood is rushing to my head
(Eyes) How can you say something like that?
(Under the eyes) This boiling anger
(Under the nose) It's so unfair
(Chin) This fire in my heart
(Collarbone) That person's rudeness
(Under the armpit) The more I think about it, the angrier I get.
(Jeongsuri) This deep resentment
Deep breath and recalibrate: Repeat “this remaining anger” or “this remaining resentment” until your pain index reaches 0.
Ending with Positive Affirmations (The Choices Method)
If your negative emotional distress index has dropped below 2, it's time to fill that space with positive energy.
If your negative emotional distress index has dropped below 2, it's time to fill that space with positive energy.
Choose a positive affirmation (repeat 3 times while tapping your palms):
"Although I was hurt by an unpleasant experience today, I now choose to protect myself from the rude comments of others."
"Even though I felt wronged and angry, I choose to acknowledge and respect my own worth."
"Although I still feel uncomfortable, I choose to let go of these feelings and focus on inner peace and happiness."
"Even though I felt wronged and angry, I choose to acknowledge and respect my own worth."
"Although I still feel uncomfortable, I choose to let go of these feelings and focus on inner peace and happiness."
Continuous tapping (remind yourself of positive choices as you tap each point):
(Eyebrow) I choose peace of mind.
(Eyes) I respect myself.
(Under eyes) Other people's opinions do not determine my worth.
(Under the nose) I love my kindness and delicacy.
(Chin) I am proud and free.
(Clavicle) I learn from this experience.
(Under the armpit) I focus on my happiness.
(Jeongsuri) I love and support myself completely.
