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When you work hard but don't get recognized
Category
- Career
- EFT
Author
- Lumen
I considered myself an indispensable member of our team and community. I didn't shy away from difficult tasks, and I was always the first to raise my hand when others balked. I stayed late at meetings to organize records, and I meticulously completed project cleanup. Yet, it seems people don't really know me. Even when my ideas were adopted and yielded positive results, they simply assumed someone else had done it. Someone else was always there to give praise, and I was left to applaud.
At first, I thought it was okay. I told myself, "Just quietly do my job." But as time passed, I felt like my insides were festering. Thoughts like, "Why do I have to do this?" and "Am I truly worthless?" kept coming back to me. The harder I tried, the more empty I felt, and I was overcome by a sense of self-loathing, as if my very existence was being denied. I belonged to this community, but I always felt like a shadow. Everyone laughed at me, but my heart was empty. Could I ever truly be a meaningful being like this?
Step-by-Step Guide to an EFT Personalized Session
The sessions below are specifically designed to heal your emotions and restore your sense of presence. EFT is a technique that combines psychology and ancient Chinese acupressure, tapping specific acupressure points to realign the body's energy system. One of the greatest advantages of EFT is that it can be easily practiced on your own.
1.
EFT Basics and Preparation
Identify the Issue and SUDS Assessment: Identify your most pressing issue (MPI). For you, this could be the feeling of being "unrecognized in the community" or the feeling of "feeling worthless." Measure the intensity of these feelings.
Rate yourself on the Subjective Units of Distress Scale (SUDS), a scale from 0 (not at all) to 10 (extremely).
Tapping Method: Use the tips of your index and middle fingers to gently but firmly tap. Tap just hard enough to avoid pain.
2.
Tapping Points
As shown in the diagram below, EFT has eight main tapping points. Tapping these points in order helps release emotions.
Eyebrow: The inner end of the eyebrow
Side of Eye: The bony protrusion on the outer side of the eye.
Under Eye: The area below the eye, where the bone protrudes
Under Nose: Between the nose and upper lip
Chin: Between the lower lip and the tip of the chin
Collarbone: Below the collarbone, 1 inch outward from the center of the neck
Under Arm: 4 inches below the armpit
Top of Head: Center of the top of the head
Karate Chop: The outer edge of the blade. This point is used in the warm-up phase before the session begins.
1.
Session Progress Order (The Basic Recipe)
EFT is a simple sequence called 'The Basic Recipe'.
EFT is a simple sequence called 'The Basic Recipe'.
2.
The Setup
Tap the Karate Chop point and repeat the following setup statement three times. This statement simultaneously acknowledges the problem and builds self-acceptance.
" I feel frustrated that no one seems to notice how hard I work in the community, but I deeply and completely accept myself. "
" Although I suffer from a sense of inferiority and a lack of presence, I deeply love and accept myself just as I am. "
" I don't feel like what I do is worth it, but I accept myself deeply and completely. "
The Sequence
Tap the eight points described above in order and repeat the Reminder Phrase. This is a short sentence that summarizes the core of the problem.
Tap the eight points described above in order and repeat the Reminder Phrase. This is a short sentence that summarizes the core of the problem.
"This frustration"
"This self-loathing"
"No presence"
"Something that no one knows"
Check In
After one round, take a deep breath and re-evaluate the intensity of your emotions. If the intensity has decreased, modify the sentence to something like "still feeling frustrated" and repeat the tapping process. You can continue this process until the emotion is completely resolved and reaches 0.
After one round, take a deep breath and re-evaluate the intensity of your emotions. If the intensity has decreased, modify the sentence to something like "still feeling frustrated" and repeat the tapping process. You can continue this process until the emotion is completely resolved and reaches 0.
Customized Session In-Depth Guide
If your emotions aren't easily resolved, it may be because there are multiple "layers" or "aspects" of the problem. To effectively use EFT, it's important to address each of these aspects one by one.
If your emotions aren't easily resolved, it may be because there are multiple "layers" or "aspects" of the problem. To effectively use EFT, it's important to address each of these aspects one by one.
Addressing specific events: Instead of a general feeling like "I feel like I don't exist," it's more effective to think of a specific event, such as "I felt like my idea was ignored in a meeting last week," and focus on that emotion.
Changing your inner narrative: It's also important to address limiting beliefs, such as "I'm not getting anywhere no matter how hard I try." EFT helps you identify the root causes of these beliefs and replace them with positive ones, such as "I am worthy and deserving of recognition."
EFT doesn't ignore or suppress your emotions. Rather, by facing and acknowledging them, it empowers you to no longer let them control you. By consistently repeating this process, you will achieve emotional freedom and be able to shine your light in the community.
